Ok, let me start this post by asking you a fairly simple question, I promise the answer to my question won’t be more than just a single word!
Q: Is there any possibility of you being in a relationship or being friends with someone who isn’t excited to be with you?
If your answer is anything other than ‘Yes/No’ then you’re in the ‘grey area” and you’re not alone there are many people who get hung up in this area where feelings are ambiguous or one person has stronger feelings than the other.
Nevertheless living in such area causes real challenges that are often accompanied by serious issues that linger on and on.
Some of the grey area questions are like:
- “She told me she’s not interested, but she still flirts with me, so should I do to get her?”
- “Oh well, I am sure she likes me, but she didn’t call me out this weekend, what should I do?”
- “This guy treats me well when he’s around, but he’s hardly around. What does that mean?”
Most dating advice you will come across focuses to solve this grey area for people by giving them canned replies.
- Say this line…
- Text her this…
- Call him this many times…
- Wear that…
Much of it gets extremely complex to the point that people actually spend more time analyzing behaviors than actually, you know… acting upon.
Fed up while being in this grey are gives birth to these unwanted triplets called manipulation, drama and mind-games.
Although the three babies may seem to bring a temporary joy into ones life but its very short lived before the seriousness of the situation takes hold and grab you by the balls.
In my honest opinion if you’re in the grey area to begin with, you’ve already lost!
Let me rephrase my earlier question and this time I want you to give yourself a bit long yet sensible answer.
Q: Why on earth would you be in a relationship or befriend someone who isn’t excited to be with you?
If such a person is not happy with you now, what makes you think he/she will be happy to be with you later on?
Why waste your time, energy and effort in convincing someone to date you or be your friend when that person makes no such effort to convince you?
It speak volumes about ‘YOU’ only if you pay attention!
Do you really think you need to convince others to be with you? To me it implies that you wouldn’t even want to be with yourself!
Ask yourself this:
- Would you buy a dog that gives you attention by biting you?
- Would you remain friends with someone who regularly ditches you the last minute or if something better comes along?
- Would you still go to work if it wasn’t paying you by the end of week?
If the answer is ‘Yes’ to any of the questions above then you should quit this page we have nothing useful for you here, however; those who answer ‘No’ should ask themselves the following questions;
- Why are you trying to make a girlfriend out of a woman who doesn’t want to date you?
- Where’s your self-respect?
The Law of ‘Fuck Yes or Hell No’ also outlines the fact when you want to get involved with someone new, in whatever relation, THEY must act and respond with a “Fuck Yes” in order for you to proceed ahead with them.
It’s abundantly clear, the Law of ‘Fuck Yes or Hell No’ implies that both of you must be enthusiastic about the prospect of each other’s company.
For those who are wondering why?
Its because good looking, attractive, non-needy, high self-worth people don’t have time for people who are not excited to be with them and who they are not excited to be with.
Sound a bit idealistic?
Maybe! But on the other hand this Law of “Fuck Yes or Hello No” has many tangible benefits on your dating life and here are my top 5 favourites:
#1. You can no longer be done over by people who are not into you so you can rest assure to end all of the headaches along with wishing and hoping, not to mention the disappointment and anger that inevitably follows.
You can start practicing self-respect and become the rejector and not the rejected.
#2. You no longer hold onto people unnecessarily to boost your own ego. We have all been guilty of this at some point. We were so-so about somebody, we only went along with it because nothing better was around. And we all have a few we’d like to take back.
Well… No more of this stringing along business.
#3. Consent issues are answered by default (and that’s ‘Hell No’) so if someone is playing mind-games with you, playing hard to get, or pressuring you into doing something you don’t want, your answer is now easy!
When it comes to dating, “If you have to ask, then you can auto-answer by applying the default answer.”
#4. Establish your personal boundaries and enforce them. It won’t only makes you more confident and attractive, but also helps to keep your sanity in the long run.
#5. Always be realistic and know you position because you’re now freeing up so much time and energy from people you’re not that into and people who are not that into you,
Welcome to the new world where people’s intentions are clear and enthusiastic… Sweet isn’t it?
The Law of ‘Fuck Yes or Hell No’ ca be applicable to dating, sex, relationships and even friendships.
You may have absolutely nothing in common with that guy/girl but if he/she is hot and are interested in getting down….
Is it a “Fuck Yes” for sex?
Oh It is?
Alright, then get down and dirty!
Stuck in a limbo with that sweet guy/girl who treats you well except the fact that he/she goes without calling or answering your calls and when you finally get to meet him/her again he/she suddenly disappears after a couple of martinis and a round of shots?
Your heads like a whirlpool wondering if he/she really likes you?
Do his/her excuses of being so busy all the time seem practical and legit?
What do you think?
does it sound like the answer to this is a “Fuck yes.”?
Well, then it’s time to move on!
This one’s for the guys …. Imagine making out with a girl at your house and every time you go to take her shirt off she stops it by pushing your hand away?
That isn’t a “Fuck Yes,” pal, therefore you can auto-answer this by apply the default answer here and just to make it more clearer no you shouldn’t keep trying nor should you pressure her into it.
Trust me the best sex you will ever experience is “Fuck Yes” sex, period!
Want to see that person again that you met on ello.ie but they keep ignoring your texts and calls?
Not sure what to say or do?
They seemed really happy to go out with you when you initially met them… Well, my friend, this is obviously NOT a “Fuck Yes” Therefore go ahead and apply the default answer here because it’s a “Hell No.”
Just delete their number and move on!
It’s important to understand that sometimes the law of ‘Fuck Yes or Hell No’ will apply differently on different levels.
You may be a “Fuck Yes” for friendship with someone, but let’s say your also mildly excited to have sex with them.
Therefore, it’s a ‘Hell No’!
You may be a “Fuck Yes” in being a fuck-buddy, but a definite “Hell No” on actually spending any time with them.
Apply the law to your decision making as it suits your needs….
Fuck Yes or Hell No shouldn’t have to dictate that you to be falling in knee-wobbling love at first sight, nor does it mean you have be completely convinced that someone is right for you.
You can be a “Fuck Yes” about getting to know someone better.
You can be a “Fuck Yes” about seeing someone again because you think there’s something genuine there.
You can also be a “Fuck Yes” and give things a few months to grind out while you see how the other party behaves and works on problems in that dynamic.
You can be a “Fuck Yes” about trying to fix things in an unhappy relationship because you can see a happy future potential.
The bottom line is….. both parties need to be ‘fuck yes’ about something despite it being problematic, otherwise you’re just wasting your time.
The real beauty of this law of “Fuck Yes or Hell No” is that it simplifies the problems by ironing them out.
The only real dating advice in life is self-improvement. Everything else is a distraction, a futile battle in the grey area and a prolonged ego trip.
With the right set of tools and performance, you may be able to con someone into sleeping with you, dating you or even marrying you.
However you will have won the battle by sacrificing the war, the war on your long-term happiness.