Whether it is the end of a holiday romance or a 10 year relationship, a break up is not only guaranteed to leave you heartbroken but rather confused at the same time but despite all the heartache do you still want to get back with your Ex? In this post I am going to discuss the top 10 signs that your Ex doesn’t want you back in their life after all!
As much as it hurts to see the one you love go off with someone else but not knowing what comes next can cause unimaginable fear as well as frustration.
However, knowing for sure, by accepting the reality of the relationship, that it is over for good as your Ex has moved on with their life without you, may not bring the much needed peace but it will surely offer some closure to your confused and feared mind.
Seeing things for exactly what they are can also bring the freedom you need to get going towards if not on the road to recovery.
Always remember, the goal after a break up should always be recovery and healing from your Ex relationship and not moving on or even worst, thinking of finding the next love. It’s a process which should be taken one day at a time until you feel that you have the courage to truly move forward with your life.
To help you gain a sense of clarity, here are the top 10 undeniable signs that he doesn’t want you back.
10. He doesn’t want to hang out with you!
Remember back in the days when he used to be down for anything?
But now he always declines your invitations or makes excuses to hang out with you.
You ask him to meet up for a coffee, lunch, dinner or anything else the two of you used do together so you two could catch up and he always says; No!
If your Ex doesn’t want to hang out with you at all, chances are he is doing his best to create distance between you so he doesn’t lead you on down the wrong path of believing you might have a chance of getting back together.
You can take his behaviour as a sign that the relationship is over.
9. You’ve been trying for a while!
So it’s been a while since your break up and to this very moment while reading this post you are still pining for his love.
You are still not sure and thinking maybe he will come back, maybe he won’t, but the truth is, it’s counterproductive to pour your time and energy into hoping and wishing to get back what you had.
Living in the past causes you to miss out on all the opportunities life has in store for you today.
If it’s not that long since you broke up, there may be a stronger chance for the reunion and eventually you two getting back together, by picking things up where you left them by taking a good hard look at what went wrong that contributed to the breakup.
However, it is still important that you focus on healing yourself and improving your mental and emotional state.
But if it’s been a while since the two of you split, and he’s not showing any signs of getting back together, it might be time that you come to terms with reality and the fact that your relationship is over for good.
8. He doesn’t even try!
Unlike women, when a guy likes a girl, he makes it pretty obvious!
There are no secret codes to figuring that out, most guys are simple and straightforward when it comes to expressing their feelings for the one they fancy or love. They hit hard and it’s difficult to miss those signs. (and that’s how nature hardwired men).
If a guy likes you, he’ll put in all the work required, no matter how long it will take, he will keep trying until he gets you.
Usually when men perceive something as valuable and important to their lives (well… it also applies to women), they will do what’s necessary to get it, whether it be toys for big boys, a big house, even YOU!
Having said that, if your EX had the opportunity to win you over by getting you back into his life but he didn’t jump at the chance to do just that, what does this tell you?
Hint: He doesn’t want you back! (thank us later)
If he had the slightest interest in getting you back, he would definitely put in some effort to make you aware of such feelings one way or another.
7. He says; you should move on!
You can feel that he is on a short leash and running out of patience with you.
You no longer have long meaningful conversations about your future or rescuing and saving your relationship.
He appears to be moving on (alone or with his new partner) and one day finally tells you it’s time for you to do the same.
Maybe he is tired of you trying to get him back or he is just tired of seeing you hurting because of him, and he wants you to move on with your life more than anything.
Whatever the reason may be it can be devastating to hear the person you love and adore say they don’t want you!
However; in our sole opinion, you spending weeks, months, or even years wondering if he will ever come back is much worse.
If your EX tells you to find someone new, someone that suits you better and genuinely wants you to find happiness elsewhere, take it as a gift!
You should focus on improving yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally.
Go out and enjoy the things you love instead of waiting for him to come back to you.
6. No trust whatsoever!
Trust is the lifeblood of all successful relationships and without it, no matter how strong and healthy the relationship is it eventually turns sour before coming to an end.
It’s like having a car but no money to refuel.
It will run for a short while but eventually, it will come to a grinding halt and die.
Just like that, trust in a relationship is just as important as fuel to the car is.
During the course of your relationship if something major happened that destroyed the trust between the two of you then it’s safe to say that he won’t want you back!
Men appreciate honesty, loyalty, and trust.
Women appreciate love, attention, trust and wealth.
Although; trust is equally important to both men and women, if he feels like he can’t trust you anymore he will have no desire to continue a serious committed relationship with you.
5. No flirting at all
Okay, anyone who’s been in a half decent relationship knows that Intimacy doesn’t just go away because of the fact that you’ve broken-up.
When you spend weeks, months, or even years building a connection with your partner, it makes sense that it will take time for those connections to sever and feelings to dissolve.
It’s safer to assume that your relationship was once filled with fun and sexy flirting; which now is the thing of the past, now you are lucky to get even a single smile, this is a strong sign that the relationship is over.
Chances are he is intentionally trying to create distance and eliminate any remaining feelings of intimacy between the two of you.
Basically, he doesn’t want to lead you on and give you the impression that he still has feelings for you, when the reality is quite the opposite!
4. Unresponsive when you reach out!
He basically puts you in his ignore list and you stay there for good.
Your texts go unanswered, phone calls ring out and go to voicemail.
He may even block your phone number.
On Social Media not only you but your mother, sisters, brothers, cousins, aunties, uncles, including your friends and anyone that was remotely linked to you in any shape or form gets thrown into the block list.
If your EX has ceased communication, you know it’s time for you not only to see the clear picture here but to also pull yourself back as well.
Although I agree, this is easier said than done and can feel like extremely difficult or even impossible thing to do but with the right help and courage it’s possible.
Depending on when you broke up it might just be the thing you actually need!
The main aim is to help you get to a better place emotionally and mentally, so not only you can gain more clarity on your current situation but also know what steps to take next.
A word of caution: Cutting off contact (no contact) may also have an adverse effect on your EX which may cause her/him to come back to you, but hey… that’s not and should not be your goal here!
Regardless of the above scenario, you should continue to practice your no contact rule
Remember your end goal? Put yourself back together, because let’s face it, breakups can really take their toll on people.
If he comes back, great…
If he doesn’t that’s even greater!
You have started the moving on process and have started to heal.
3. He always seems annoyed at you
Did you notice how your EX reacted when you bumped into him/her?
Was he excited to see you?
Was he bothered?
Did he try to start a conversation?
Did he even acknowledge your existence in public or to him/her you were completely invisible?
Think about it!
This will tell you a whole lot about how he feels about the relationship.
If your EX is arrogant, angry, or annoyed whenever he is around you, take that as a bright indicator that the relationship is over and done with!
If you cheated on him/her during the relationship, or spitefully sold his/her favourite things that were his/hers pride and joy or something like that, it makes sense that he might still be angry for a while after the breakup.
Although in some cases his/hers annoyance might even be a sign that he still has feelings for you, depending on why your relationship ended, because every relationship breakup is somehow unique and so are the things that led to that breakup.
However, if that is not the case (most of the time it isn’t) and he just seems super annoyed and angry by your sole existence rather than anything in particular that you did, he probably just wants the relationship to be done and over with.
2. He is already in a new relationship!
Okay whether their relationship is a serious one or a rebound you should consider it serious by all means and it’s not your job to investigate how often they are intimate, or whether they are thinking of moving in together. As far as you are concerned they have moved on with their life.
If your friends saw him/her out in town with a new chick/guy or he has changed his/her Facebook status from single to “in a relationship.” (or both) remember, he has a new partner.
We all agree, not all relationships are created equal, sometimes the easiest way to numb the pain of a previous relationship is to jump right into a new one, possibly a rebound.
So in the case of a rebound, who knows what the outcome will be?
If he is only with someone else to help forget about you, there’s a slight chance (depending on the reason for your breakup) that he still has strong feelings for you and might come back (but you shouldn’t bank on that, regardless of its authenticity, besides that it won’t help you to heal and recover in any way).
But, if he appeared to have moved on to a healthy and happy new relationship then take that as a strong indicator he doesn’t want you back.
Meanwhile it’s an opportunity for you to hit the road of recovery and if you are on it already then stay put as long as you can, take all the time to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally for your own new and amazing life ahead.
1. He just wants nothing to do with you
Usually when a man is done with a relationship, he is not on his best behaviour because he doesn’t feel the need to be, or even rub it on your face that he is no longer interested.
Therefore, when your EX tells you flat out or shows you through his actions that he is done with you, the best thing you can do is believe him!
If you’re the one who wants your Ex back, I can understand how painful it’s been to have made it through all the points above, especially if some of those resonated with you.
However, it’s better to have all the information that you need to get closure….
Longing for someone who clearly does not share the same feelings as you do, will never get you the love life that you truly desire.
By taking full responsibility for your love life and actively working on yourself is the single most precious gift you can give yourself.
When the right man comes along (and he will) you both will be prepared to take on that journey together as one.
I am certain this post gave you a lot of clarity on where you stand with your Ex.
After reading this if you have come to the conclusion that your Ex doesn’t want you back, do not worry!
All hope is not lost…
It is very much possible to get your Ex back, but it won’t happen right now just because you want it to.
Although, personally I do not recommend anyone getting back with their Ex but in some cases it’s worth a try!
Although it’s not an easy process, and requires persistence and patience but in the end you can get him back even if they have moved on with someone new (yes it’s possible) but you need to know arm yourself with the right knowledge.
You can eventually make your Ex not only miss you desperately but also realise you were “the one” yes “the right one” for them and I will talk about it all in one of my future posts.
I also want to mention that there are hundreds of thousands of single people in Ireland and hundreds of millions worldwide!
Why not try and give it a shot with someone just as amazing as yourself, someone who is more into you, someone who is more suitable to your lifestyle, someone who suits you better!
Why not download the ello.ie app and meet someone amazing today!
You know, a single swipe can change your life….
Like single women, men are also searching for a partner.
Go on… Start your own love story today!